Codependent No More - How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself was originally published in 1986. Written by Melody Beattie in the Self-Help genre, it is considered a “Modern Classic”. This is an inspirational book that explains and helps you if you are in an unhealthy codependency relationship.
I just finished listening to the “free” audio book available on YouTube and found it as meaningful and enlightening.
Here are a few brief quotes from the book:
“Codependents make great employees. They don’t complain; they do more than their share; they do whatever is asked of them; they please people; and they try to do their work perfectly—at least for a while, until they become angry and resentful.”
“Letting go helps us to to live in a more peaceful state of mind and helps restore our balance. It allows others to be responsible for themselves and for us to take our hands off situations that do not belong to us. This frees us from unnecessary stress.”
“The only person you can now or ever change is yourself. The only person that it is your business to control is yourself.”
“Codependents appear to be depended upon, but they are dependent.”
“We rescue people from their responsibilities. We take care of people’s responsibilities for them. Later we get mad at them for what we’ve done. Then we feel used and sorry for ourselves.”
“If you did not have that person or problem in your life, what would you be doing with your life that is different from what you are doing now? How would you be feeling and behaving? Spend a few minutes visualizing yourself living your life, feeling and behaving that way—in spite of your unsolved problem.”
“Detaching does not mean we don’t care. It means we learn to love, care, and be involved without going crazy.”
Aloha -- Cathi